In our society, a well-behaved child is one who is always calm and obedient, preferably as little loud as possible and certainly not throwing tantrums.
What doesn't seem to be a problem for us adults, namely cursing or scolding when something goes wrong, is not something we like to see in children.
They also have the right to express their feelings and should. Because as we all know, swallowing anything can make you sick. Not just us adults.
It is logical that sadness and anger express themselves differently in children than in adults. First of all, they have to learn how to deal with these new feelings. During the defiance phase, it is also beneficial for their development because they slowly learn to become independent and no longer blindly do everything they are told.
And even as they get older, sometimes they just don't know how to make themselves heard other than by screaming loudly or crying. Which is what some adults still do.
What can we as parents do? Stay calm and listen. Even if it is often difficult. Because if we react just as hot-tempered and loudly as our child, it makes the whole thing unnecessarily worse. But let's show our child that it's okay to let these feelings out and let's listen to him and try to help. If we can and the child allows it, we'll defuse the situation and he'll calm down more quickly.
But if we try to teach our child to show as few emotions as possible, or if they only show positive emotions, we can do bad things. On the one hand, neither we nor others will notice if he is not feeling well. On the other hand, later as an adult they will have problems showing or expressing their feelings, which can make life very difficult.
Therefore, we should be open to our children's expressions of emotions, even if they are not always positive. But in this case, we parents are laying the foundation for how our child will deal with it later as an adult and have a healthy attitude towards all of its emotions.
